Album of the Year: DISCO by Kylie Minogue

 The album title that isn't a misnomer but part of a false cognate pop music has had for over 2 years regarding anything with a mirror ball in a music video as "disco".

For this series, I'll be going op-ed on those that like reading subjective criticism from a cynical bitch about an album released in 2020 that should be considered Album of the Year to the Grammys, American music publications and online music communities that want to get over the "Monday Blues" (Sure the line could've been "or anyone that wants to 'Say Something' nice" but then I would've had to say something nice about that mediocre at best lead single). This entry is dedicated to DISCO, the 15th studio album by the nicest pop goddess that people have heard of assuming the person talking about them is gay Kylie Minogue. Why does the 15th album by an Australian turned British queen people like need to be discussed? Get to know the songs and you'll find out.

Disco comes in a standard and deluxe format, with Spotify having the deluxe format with 16 tracks total which are:

1. "Magic"

2. "Miss a Thing"

3. "Real Groove"

4. "Monday Blues"

5. "Supernova"

6. "Say Something"

7. "Last Chance"

8. "I Love It"

9. "Where Does the DJ Go?"

10. "Dance Floor Darling"

11. "Unstoppable"

12. "Celebrate You"

13. "Till You Love Somebody"

14. "Fine Wine"

15. "Hey Lonely"

16. "Spotlight"

As with any major release from a pop act of late, the album yielded two singles and some album track tossed out as a "promotional" or "buzz" single (Apparently, the pop industry is so lazy they've taken the Valve strategy of "can't count to 3" a little too far.) The lead single for the album called Disco...was the very clearly 1980s synthpop sounding track "Say Something". Let me "say something" as this is a bad lead single. It makes sense on the album but any time "disco" is mentioned, it's as if no one either on the mic or on the soundboard knows what the fuck disco means. If one of the first things to come to mind is Donna Summers' heyday of the mid to late 70s, congratulations, you have a better understanding of the genre than current music professionals.

As mentioned earlier, the album title isn't a misnomer, but a false cognate (especially given the music video's interpretation of disco is just a reference to the outlandish shit that transpired at Studio 54). The disconnect between an 80s synthpop track on an album called "Disco" is something between disco, the genre of music and a discotheque, a venue in which disco or other club music can be played or performed in. Disco, along with the lead single of Miley Cyrus' Plastic Hearts album "Midnight Sky", Doja Cat's fifth single from her Hot Pink album "Say So", Katy Perry's attempt at a disco music video for the Smile track "Champagne Problems" and most of Dua Lipa's sophomore effort Future Nostalgia [most notably the music video for the very fucking clearly 80s synthwave inspired "Physical"] have been labeled as "disco".

Spelled out, the disconnect can seemingly be explained as, "Hey, we still really like ripping off the 80s but people are wanting disco for some reason. I think disco didn't quite die until like 1983 so let's just shill synthpop with the disco name on it and have a mirror ball in the video."

The second single from the album [and a massive step forward] was "Magic", which gave her a Top 10 in Scotland but a 57th Top 75 in the UK (The UK is far far more forgiving of pop divas of a certain career span or the charts to look this up are than in the US.) and even saw a remix from Purple Disco Machine [who by 2020 had scored a #1 on the Dance Club Songs chart in January 2019 over a Fatboy Slim remix and remixed Lady Gaga's second single from Chromatica, "Rain on Me".] The song itself still feels slightly more 1981 than 1978, but it does have more of bouncy disco feel that makes sense as a single and more effectively as the opener on the album.

As for "I Love It", the third collective song tossed out there in the name of "promo" or more like "Pop can't count to 3"? Personally, it sure does sound like a "track 8" on an album but I mean, it has its fans (And come Chromatica this is gonna be applied at that album's attempt at a third single, just you wait.)

Disco would debut at #1, giving Kylie Minogue her 8th #1 album in the UK and a chart achievement as she became the first female artist to score a Number 1 on the UK’s Official Albums Chart in five consecutive decades, following Kylie (1988), Enjoy Yourself (1989), Greatest Hits (1992), Fever (2001), Aphrodite (2010), Golden (2018) and Step Back In Time: The Definitive Collection (2019). As for what has Disco end up being an album of the year, it relates to what made Melanie C a triumph: it was a dance album made by someone with years of experience releasing it just because they wanted to with mostly high points.

No one expects a dance diva to last beyond 3 albums at the most; no one expects most pop divas to survive beyond maybe 4 albums. The fact that Kylie Minogue has survived to 15 albums [her contemporary Madonna reaching 14 last year] is astounding. What has this album stand out is that it's a well respected dance diva having fun regardless of singles being paid [and certified] dust. Granted, most listeners can ask answer the same questions: does Disco challenge Minogue artistically? [no] Is Disco that reminiscent of the 1970s? [no] Is Disco the most cohesive album to Minogue's name since Fever or Aphrodite? [yes] Should clubs being playing this album once the COVID-19 pandemic is over and humanity is safe? [yes, yes, 1,000 times yes]

In short, Disco was a 2020 release from a "Dance Floor Darling" that did its best to get listeners through "Monday Blues".

RECOMMENDED TRACKS: "Miss a Thing", "Monday Blues", "Supernova" and "Dance Floor Darling".

Album of the Year: Lioness Eyes by Melody Thornton

 If songs from 3 years ago can chart like they were recently released, I can consider an EP from former Pussycat Dolls member Melody Thornton and ALBUM of the Year, deal.

In this series, I'll be going op-ed on anyone bothering to read this about a release in 2020 that could be considered an Album of the Year to the Grammys, American music publications and online music communities but for some reason aren't looked at through "Lioness Eyes" (Though some take "pride" in bad taste.) This entry is dedicated to the debut EP of Melody Thornton, the former Pussycat Doll who had it in her to release a full project. What makes this EP an Album of the Year? Get to know the songs and it'll make sense.

The tracklist for Lioness Eyes is as follows:

1. "Pray For Me"

2. "Goodbye To Happiness"

3. "Love Will Return"

4. "Sing About You"

5. "I Will Wait"

6. "Lioness Eyes"

7. "Phoenix Rise"

Thornton has been an independent artist since 2011, when her first solo single "Sweet Vendetta" was released and then eventually the 2012 mixtape P.O.Y.B.L [which stands for "Piss On Your Black List"] was released. The mixtape itself isn't available for streaming although "Sweet Vendetta" is. Thornton's streaming availability was largely limited to one off collaborative efforts with recording act Bobby Newberry and a 2019 remake of "Freak Like Me" with Harrison.

But November 15th, 2019 would yield the first solo single Thornton would release in 8 years and after slogging through the dredges of UK reality TV shows, "Love Will Return". The song would be indicative of the 1960s/1970s style of music she has said in multiple interviews that she grew up on [and it also helps that she was in a 70s themed musical in the UK called Rip It Up the Show in 2019.] Despite a 2019 release, the video for "Love Will Return" wouldn't see release until August 19, 2020 [nine months after single release.] The video committed to the "lady in red" character she had created which wouldn't really get an exploration until the video for the fourth collective video [and in a way second video single] "Goodbye to Happiness".

The second single and video released was "Phoenix Rise" which upon release took special context at the time of its release [the single being released on July 24th and the video being released on July 29th, 2020] coinciding with an upswing in social justice advocacy. The single art for the song proves the old saying true, "A picture is worth a thousand words."

The next video was released on September 2, 2020 for the song, "I Will Wait" [which acted as the first of two video singles, or promotional singles that have a music video budget behind them]. It returned to the glamorized 1960s/1970s vintage or cinematic aesthete Thornton had aspired to bring forth with Lioness Eyes. What makes the video unique is that Thornton celebrates her half Mexican heritage with a Mariachi ensemble to boot (And if you remember Aundrea Fimbres from Danity Kane and Ally Brooke from Fifth Harmony and compare their stories to Melody, it would be the best singer and "worst dancer" that ends up being the one you find out years later was Mexican. Representation matters regardless so from one Mexicano to another, si se puede!)

The fourth and last collective video and second and last video single was released on October 27th, 2020 for the song "Goodbye to Happiness". Utilizing the most out of the album's brief of "cinematic 60s/70s pop but for today", the video for "Goodbye to Happiness" is the most blatantly 1960s of the entire era. From the video concept of embracing feminism no matter how uncomfortable it made the mainstream (And leave it to someone who was a member of the Pussycat Dolls to know what sexism in action looks like), to the set design both being part of Thornton's character in the video confronting the journalist over their conduct to even the wardrobe and hairstyle featured at large. Minute details mixed in with the overall message spelled out in the beginning, "Feminism is the future" and with even less subtext at the end, "Feminism is a practice".

With all four of the songs released either as single or video single in some capacity, here's what makes this project a contender for one of the best releases of the year: it ends up spelling out all of Melody Thornton's trials and tribulations to even get to a point of releasing an EP as a solo artist when previously, it was a mixtape or loose singles with another artist. Even with Thornton at her most realized, Lioness Eyes shows that there's still contentious directions taken throughout the era just to get her name back out there ("Isn't that just a convoluted way of saying there's push and pull throughout?" Yes, and I'm getting there.)

The good side of Lioness Eyes is that this is Thornton making a case as to why she deserves attention for music, especially when as an independent artist since 2011 or nearly a decade come 2021, she's displayed immense talent in creating immersive work [the commitment to visual direction for all four music videos/singles or video singles being the most notable.]

The bad side of Lioness Eyes is the fact that there's some cracks in the definitive vintage aesthetic she created. Make no mistake, the cracks are in no way enough to detract from the fact that a seven song EP from a former member of the Pussycat Dolls is one of the best releases in 2020. It's that each crack represents part of the contentious or conflicting elements in the name of...well getting her name back out there.

The first crack is a vocal one: at the beginning of the EP on "Pray For Me", some of the vocal stylings sound a bit off but there is a justifiable reason for this. Back in 2011, Thornton competed on the second and final season of the UK reality show Popstar to Operastar, where she ultimately came in 6th place (And for the record, Kimberly Wyatt is the only member of PCD that would go on to win the competition show she competed on, snatching the crown for Celebrity Masterchef in 2015.) Thornton's vocals might not be the track to recommend first to anyone unfamiliar with her [which is the only reason this is considered a crack] but the track does showcase that she maintained the opera technique she learned in the two weeks she competed [which between 8 or 9 years is remarkable].

The second crack is the song "Sing About You", which mind you is a very good song, but has a contemporary sound to it which works against the cinematic vintage sheen that Thornton coats for six other tracks [let's be real, cohesion can't even be a minor thing to look at on the average EP regardless of tracklisting]. However, even if one track sandwiched in the middle of the project goes against the brief, it's not enough to detract from how well made it is.

The third crack can come watching the choreography in "Goodbye to Happiness", which itself is odd considering that towards the beginning of 2019 and Thornton giving multiple interviews saying she wasn't going to reunite with the Pussycat Dolls and even releasing "Love Will Return" a mere two or so weeks before PCD took the X Factor UK stage and debuted "React". Thornton has stated in multiple interviews that lo and behold she wasn't in the group to dance and going back to that wasn't conducive to her mental well being [if you read between the lines enough.] What makes the dancing all the more odd is that it reads as intense choreography on a song that doesn't call for choreography even in a video that's decidedly camp or enveloped in the vintage sheen that coats the project [to be fair, the choreography could be in reference to gogo style pop acts in the 60s such as Nancy Sinatra in the video for "Boots Were Made for Walkin'"].

In essence, all three cracks are bittersweet signs of the progress Thornton took to even get to releasing new music. She improved her vocal technique even if she inherited the weird "opera singer can't do most pop notes but is able to sing" a la Malena Ernman. She proved to be more than capable of making contemporary sounding music at her discretion, even if it wasn't indicative of the project in question. She proved that even with dancing not being her strong suit, she could hit choreographed dance moves in a music video even if the song kind of maybe doesn't call for it.

Overall, Lioness Eyes is a heartfelt project from someone who bided their time or said "I Will Wait" and had at least some people hear her out.

RECOMMENDED TRACKS: [honestly the whole damn EP but pay special attention to] "Lioness Eyes", "Love Will Return" and "Sing About You".

Album of the Year: Melanie C

 In this series, I'll be going op-ed on anyone that bothers to read this about an album that's good but probably not "Good Enough" to be considered Album of the Year at either the Grammy Awards, American music publications or even online communities that wouldn't give a shit about them (Mind you these communities will insist on the same three failed acts as being the saviors of pop music when they can barely go triple bus pass in terms of first week sales.)

This entry is dedicated to the eighth album from former Spice Girl and UK superstar Melanie C [the album name is her stage name, werk efficiency]. 

What was it about this album in particular that had the international gay fanbase go wild with fervor over a Mel C album era? Once you know the songs, you'll know.

On most streaming sites, Melanie C's album appears as the 10 track original:

1. "Who I Am"

2. "Blame It on Me"

3. "Good Enough"

4. "Escape"

5. "Overload"

6. "Fearless" (featuring Nadia Rose)

7. "Here I Am"

8. "Nowhere to Run"

9. "In and Out of Love"

10. "End of Everything"

A separate second physical disc has three bonus tracks and three remixes [only the three remixes can also be found on streaming sites with two other remixes that didn't make the album proper]:

1. "Self Love"

2. "Into You"

3. "Touch Me" [a cover of the 2001 Rui da Silva and Cassandra song of the same name, which holds the distinction as the first progressive house song to reach #1 in the UK]

4. "Who I Am" (Joe Goddard remix)

5. "Blame It on Me" (PBH & Jack remix)

6. "High Heels" (featuring Sink the Pink) (Moto Blanco remix)

Six songs were released in some capacity from the album, with four being considered singles and two of them being a non-album single and a promotional single. "High Heels" was first released in 2019 but eventually got non-album single status as the remix on Disc 2.

"Who I Am" ended up the lead single and even had the Joe Goddard remix reach #4 on the UK Commercial Pop Club charts in its 5th and last week on that chart [after reaching the Top 10 in its 4th week].

"Blame It On Me" was the third collective song and second single released, with the PBH & Jack remix reaching a higher peak albeit with one less week on the UK Commercial Pop Club charts, at #2 in its 4th and final week, having reached the Top 10 in its 2nd week [ultimately being held off from #1 by "Feel Right Now" by Parx and Nonô]. "In And Out of Love" was the fourth song and third single released from the album, which was noted for its surprisingly contemporary sound [some even drawing comparisons production wise to Dua Lipa's sophomore effort, Future Nostalgia.] Although not featured on the album proper, the Nick Reach Up remix was made available on streaming sites shortly after release.

The last single of the era was "Fearless", a collaborative effort featuring the relatively new UK singer Nadia Rose. The song was considered bold for the former Spice Girl and earned positive reviews in return. The last song released and second promotional/buzz single was "Overload", which like "In And Out of Love" doesn't have its remix on the album proper but does have its Karim Naas remix available on streaming sites shortly after its release. "Overload" was seen with slightly less but still noticeable praise for the consistent musical style the album's other offerings had made.

The album itself peaked and debuted at #8, becoming Melanie C's third Top 10 album in the UK and marked her first Top 10 album in 17(!) years since her 2003 sophomore effort Reason. ("Umm, what does a UK album have to do with the US?" I'M GETTING THERE.)

What made Melanie C a pick for album of the year in my eyes, let alone resonate with fans on internet forums and social media alike? In complete honesty, the singles run was flawless and the album itself is Melanie C's most cohesive and enjoyable. There's a simplicity to the album that can't be overlooked and it helps that the artist behind the album was a veteran of pop music who had a renewed spirit and sounded better than ever (There's a certain album in this series that can also fit under this description, so look out for that one). However, there's a case of "for better and worse" that has never escaped Melanie C and that is the fact that even in eight albums, there's a signature vocal and head scratching lyrical content.

For context, Mel C was always considered the best vocalist in the Spice Girls and of the solo albums, had the most promising career ahead of her [which having made it to eight albums later, despite six of them being independent, did prove that to be true]. Eight albums later, she sounds the same in terms of being a capable vocalist but still possessing the weirdest timbre in pop music. Meaning, despite having the largest vocal range and ability of her groupmates, whenever Mel C has to hit certain high notes, whatever her timbre does sounds slightly strained [it could be a larynx issue, it could be her northern UK accent, no one knows for sure but eight albums later means you stopped wondering why and accepted it.]

There are two tracks in particular on this release that drive the point home. On "Who I Am", towards the climax of the song when she sings "I'm ready to drop my armour/it will make me stronger", she sounds just this side of sharp or weirdly straining to a lot of casual listens. On the cover of "Touch Me", towards the climax of that song when she sings "I'll take your love and I'll take my chances/I'll take them with you" or even the hook "Touch Me in the morning/and last thing at night/keep my body warm, baby/you know it feels right", she has the same issue of sounding this side of sharp or if her vocals prove an acquired taste for casual listeners, "strained".

However, in eight albums there are still moments of lyrical simplicity or in the case of "High Heels", a case of "wait what, play that back" comes up that hasn't really been seen since "If That Were Me", the last single from her debut album Northern Star.

"I couldn't live without my phone/but you don't even have a home" - 1999 turned November of 2000 when the song was released. In 2019, "High Heels" had these lyrics: "It's been five weeks since I started saving for my new shoes/they're coming out of the box tonight, they're gonna wow you". This proved that for all the strides made in her career, Mel C still had lyrical hiccups which admittedly no one cared about at large because not only was "High Heels" a glorious dance-pop song (And believe me when I tell you, the only thing worse to forums and online music communities than bad lyrics are bad lyrics in slow songs or ballads.)

What makes the album something worth revisiting over and over again is that like her idol Madonna on 2019's Madame X, Melanie C wanted to release music because she was legitimately inspired, no one expected it but the public was behind her when it came time to listen to the music. Not since her debut has Melanie C been so revered in terms of singles choice, album cohesion and especially music videos.

In short, she said that's "Who I Am" and anybody that listened ate it up.

RECOMMENDED TRACKS: "Who I Am", "In And Out of Love", "Touch Me" (which honestly sounds like if there was a reboot of the show Queer as Folk, this song is on it and I mean that as a compliment), "Blame It On Me" and "End of Everything" because it's a great closer to the album proper.

Wiping It Off His Chin: The Comeback

 I'm thinking of reviving this dead blog for some reason or another, so why not just go in willy-nilly without anything to recap (Besides, the market to recap RuPaul's Drag Race is more oversaturated than the goddamn McRib.)

Nevertheless, I might [operative word here] want to post something as it relates to a short series of pop albums/releases that I considered worth my time in 2020 (And if anything indicates how long I've been away, just look up a meme on a timeline about how 2020 has felt like 15 years from just the summer alone.)

I admit, I stopped caring about trying to pimp myself out with the written word basically because no one cares and I have to learn to be OK. I want attention for my writing just because I want it to be seen. Am I intentionally seeking a reaction? No, because apparently that requires planning beyond my patience level and subtlety, which I do not have.

I'll write about whatever I want, take umbrage with a certain male singer that went on a hypocritical business venture just to "pay bills" [while still unaware that doing it for the money means you'll pay for it every minute] and basically shittalk at my discretion.

I Cancelled The Series Due to Lack of Motivation

A self-explanatory title, Unintentionally RATESist has now officially been axed considering I couldn't get the 3rd rate off the ground. Between those albums "My Address is Hollywood" by Adore Delano was going to win that one.

As a result of the cancellation, part 2 of that rate, After Party vs. Taxidermy vs. Poundcake and part 3 of that rate, Whatever vs. Battle Axe vs. American is no longer happening.

These other rates as a result are now officially canned:

Danity Kane vs. Doll Domination vs. Welcome to the Dollhouse

18 Months vs. Motion vs. Discovery vs. Random Access Memories

0304 vs. Liz Phair vs. C'mon, C'mon

Double Dutchess vs. Beautiful Trauma vs. This Is What The Truth Feels Like vs. Meaning of Life

Rebellious Soul vs. Love and War vs. Girl Disrupted

Had I been motivated at all to do this, things would be different but alas, that is not the case.

Unintentionally RATESist: Till Death Do Us Party vs. PG-13 vs. Anus

Happy 2018 from the blog; what better way to celebrate than to announce the much delayed 3rd installment of Unintentionally RATESist. This time, RPDR alumnae Adore Delano, Sharon Needles and Alaska Thunderfuck will duke it out with their debut albums. BUT WAIT, did I neglect to remind you for about the umpteenth time that this is Round 1 of a three round match? some point later [think 5th or 6th post for this series], their second albums will duke it out; and then RuPaul herself will take Alaska's place for Round 3.

Exciting shit, I know; that aside, let's get to what is up for the crown in Round 1:

Till Death Do Us Party
- Speak My Sex
- DTF
- Party
- I Adore U
- Calling All Goddesses
- Jump the Gun
- Give Me Tonight
- I Look Fuckin' Cool (ft. Alaska Thunderfuck)
- Hello, I Love You
- The Creeps
- My Address is Hollywood

PG-13
- This Club is a Haunted House (ft. RuPaul)
- Call Me on the Ouija Board
- Dead Girls Never Say No
- Drink Till I Die
- I Wish I Were Amanda Lepore (ft. Amanda Lepore)
- Why Do You Think You Are Nuts?
- Disco Ball
- Dressed to Kill
- Let's All Die
- Kai Kai (ft. Ana Matronic & Alaska Thunderfuck)
- Everyday Is Halloween (ft. Armen Ra)
- Hail Satan! (ft. Jayne County)

Anus
- Hieeee
- Anus
- Pussy
- Beard
- This Is My Hair
- Nails
- Gimme All Your Money (ft. Laganja Estranja MAWMA OKCURR...excuse me...O'QUAAAAAAAANCH)
- Everything Tonight
- Best Night Ever
- The Shade of It All (ft. Courtney Act and Willam)
- Legendary
- Killer
- Your Makeup Is Terrible


Keep your eyes out for [very roughly by] the end of the month to find out the results of Round 1.

New Year, Who Knows

I'm closing off 2017 like anybody else that thinks they're important enough to say "this is how I'm ending 2017" (but thankfully having enough active brain cells to not pander to the "new year, new me" bullshit); I don't know what's coming but something has to be done.

In terms of the blog, I'm keeping Unintentionally RATESist going. I have the drafts for the other rates queued up so it's not like I have to up and delete those. I will say this much: I got lazy/tuckered out when it came to trying to determine what rate I'm doing 3rd. The idea comes down to what I really want to do with the RuGirls rates [which for reference is Adore Delano vs. Sharon Needles vs. Alaska Thunderfuck 5000 Bonina Banana Fofana Oksana Baiul Rigga Morris Andre Charles Brown for the first two installments before RuPaul gets in the ring for Round 3.]

It's either do all 3 towards the latter half of the series or do one for the 3rd, 6th and 9th ever installments of the series. I'll decide on something which has to happen as the 3rd ever installment has to happen.
Before that, I'd like to announce that a 10th installment has been commissioned pitting R&B divadom in new blood debuts; i.e. the debuts of R&B divas in their own right. Which ones am I talking about?

- Rebellious Soul [K. Michelle] vs. Love and War [Tamar Braxton] vs. Girl Disrupted [Sevyn Streeter]

Sure, I'm not technically reviewing the actual debut of Tamar Braxton, but let's be real; no one would want to do such a thing.

If the 3rd installment doesn't end up being Til Death Do Us Party vs. PG-13 vs. Anus, I'll probably do the 2 on 1 matchup of Danity Kane vs. Doll Domination vs. Welcome to the Dollhouse.

Apart from that, my life will revolve around Steve Grand stanning, social media beefcake validation and other forms of lollygagging. Happy New Year, y'all.