Thursday, November 7, 2013

The Voice U.S. S5 Recap: Vague Maury Povich Reference

The results are in and 8 people are "The Father of MrSwearwordeedrica" (i.e. Eliminated from the show). After 2 nights and 20 singers, The Voice is ready to move on to the Top 12; but at whose expense? O_o Suspense. Emotion. Passion. Tired Calvin Klein perfume ad gag. Below are the gerunds, marklar and nouns that transpired in tonight's results show...

Let's play rough and get it on!

Team Blake took the stage first to sing "Free Ride" [by who, I don't know...all I know is that Nic was channeling a chicken with its head cut off on stage (Which Blake must consider a warm childhood memory.)] Then it was revealed that their team was the first to find out which 2 were indeed the "Father of MrSwearwordeedrica".

The two with the top votes on that team turned out to be...Austin Jenckes and Cole Vosbury. Lyndsey Parker is at least happy with Cole.

After Blake gave his "Calvin & Florence", the contestant that was saved was...Ray Boudreaux.

Shelbie Z. & Nic Hawk are out of the competition. Boo on Shelbie being ousted but Nic is eliminated...when America gets the vote right, I smile. Anywho, take care Shelbie!

Team Cee-Lo than took the stage singing "Give A Little Bit". The theme was red because of the Team Cee-Lo nickname "the Red Zone". However, despite Amber and Tamara [and Johnny's hair] looking fabulous, CopyKat was terrible looking. Helena Bonham Carter inspired plaid meets 70s inspired rock should never be a thing seen in public. O_O

The two with the top votes on that team turned out to be...Caroline Pannell and Jonny Gray. Wow, America is getting the votes right so far.

After Cee-Lo gives his "Calvin & Florence", the artist saved was...CopyKat. -_- Thanks Cee-Lo -_-

Amber Nicole & Tamara Chauniece are out of the competition. Amber had the She-Devil of S3 song and Tamara suffered from the "Disco Death Knell". Take care Amber and Tamara!

Team X-Tina then took the stage singing "Love Somebody" by Maroon 5 (Adam's main source of money before this in case you forgot.) They sounded so unpolished and out of synchronization...Adam and even Blake didn't look impressed by their performance.

The two with the top votes on that team turned out to be...Jacquie Lee and Matthew Schuler. Of course these two are saved of X-Tina's team first; they had the best performances of X-Tina's night.

After X-Tina gives her "Calvin & Florence", the person saved was...Josh Logan. Took you long enough to make the wrong decision, X-Tina.

Stephanie Anne Johnson & Mason-Dixon Barbie...err Olivia Henken are out of the competition. Well at least, Barbie got put back on the shelf. Stephanie was lovely and I hated seeing her go. Take care Stephanie!

Finally, Team Adam took the stage by singing "Safe & Sound" by Capital Cities. They were the most synchronized of the teams that night (Hiding Tessanne and Will's vocals always helps.) Oh and bonus moment? Grey was wearing blue and looked like she was more vibrant in personality (And I was painting with all the colors of the wind.)

The two with the top votes on that team turned out to be...James Wolpert and HRFH -2.0. Thanks voting public half I hate.

After Adam gives his "Calvin & Florence", the last save of S5 went to...Will Champlin. He improved enough...but he's still a touch unbearable.

Preston Pohl & Grey are out of the competition. To Adam all options sucked. OK then. Preston went too current too soon and Grey was too clean on a Paramore song. Not totally surprised.

All in all, the Top 12 have been established no matter how many of the acts I dislike are still there...for now O_o

Next up for scrutiny, performances of the Top 12.

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