Monday, April 28, 2014

The Voice Season 6: Someone's Getting it Back 10 Fold

*Editor's Note: I'm experimenting with recap title format changes. Live with it.*

[The recap title for tonight is in part reference to a saying that you get what you give 10 times over/10 fold]


Tonight continues the journey 10 singers are taking on the NBC show with ratings. Along the way, Adam, Usher, Shakira and Blake overpraise their singing abilities (Being nice on this show works. To a fault; like the San Andreas, but hey; get that, make that money.) and compete for a swift chance to gloat between seasons ("Between?" When they're not filming, silly.) These are the nouns, pronouns, gerunds, banter, fuckery, overpraising and marklar that transpired...

Let's play rough and get it on!


First up in the Court of Public Opinion, Kat Perkins of Team Adam singing “Landslide” by Fleetwood Mac. Rehearsals indicate she needs improvement with lower registers. Come showtime, she manages to improve on her lower registers enough to be improved. The vibrato for anything Stevie Nicks related was certainly present. Not being mean; Stevie Nicks sings with a ton of vibrato. All Kat needed to be was subtle through low notes. She did that aside from vibrato; this is one of her better performances. Coach's Corner was all "THAT WAS MARVELOUS DARLING! #SuperStar!"

Second, Tess Boyer of Team Shakira singing “Ain’t it Fun” by Paramore. Rehearsals indicate that she'll have to face the "current" dilemma. The "current" dilemma is when a singer/act is faced with the problem of singing songs that are either overdone or "old" or aren't obscure as hell. Come showtime, she has decent singing but doesn't have any of the "hairspray angst" that Paramore songs call for. She did pick a "current" song but fans have to be on her side in voting. Coach's Corner was all "THAT WAS SUPERB DARLING! #SuperStar!"

Third, Audra McLaughlin of Team Blake singing “You Lie” by Reba McEntire. Rehearsals indicate Audra has to stand out more than she has. Come showtime, Audra may have had a breakout moment...had it not been for Blake being an ass and maybe...just maybe tweeting Adam's number to the public. Her singing has been mediocre at best. Blake's stunt might cost her votes she needs. Coach's Corner was all "THAT WAS FABULOUS DARLING! #SuperStar!"

Fourth, Josh Kaufman of Team Usher singing “This is It” by Kenny Loggins. Rehearsals indicate that Josh's timing and pacing have to be right on par with the song to be excelsior. Come showtime, he certainly showed his lower registers...until his supposed money notes he sang way too breathy for my liking. Coach's Corner was all "THAT WAS WONDERFUL DARLING! #SuperStar!" Apparently, a male HRFH has been found. Only (in honor of SurvivorSucks) his stands for His Royal Frodo Highness.

Fifth, The Grimmie Reaper of Team Adam singing “Hold On, We’re Going Home” by Drake. Rehearsals indicate she's got some Lindsey Pavao of S2 sized shoes to fill with making a rap song...not. Come showtime, the performance was all risk and low to moderate reward at best. Adam gets some credit for wanting someone to pull a Lindsey Pavao and make a rap song...not. Coach's Corner was all "THAT WAS SPLENDID DARLING! #SuperStar!"

Sixth, Jake Worthington of Team Blake singing “Run” by George Strait. Rehearsals indicate that Jake is going to have to not "sing over the note" [whatever the hell that means]. Come showtime, as much as I don't care about country music, something about Jake's singing was subdued. He does have a bigger iTunes pulling than at least HRFH -3.0 so he might not be terribly screwed. Coach's Corner was all "THAT WAS STUPENDOUS DARLING! #SuperStar!"

Seventh, Bria Kelly of Team Usher singing “I’m With You” by Avril Lavigne. Rehearsals indicate Bria's vulnerability is called into question. Come showtime, Bria was OK until she hit the weirdest bum note I heard in show history. It was something like an "ohwhohwowhwohwohwowowowowowhohhhh" or something just utterly bad. Bria's performance history will have to be scrutinized harder for voting. Coach's Corner was all "THAT WAS TERRIFIC DARLING! #SuperStar!" except for Adam who actually called out Bria for emotional dissonance. 1000 points to you Adam. Good move.

Eighth, Delvin Choice of Team Adam singing “Bright Lights” by Gary Clark Jr. Rehearsals indicate his delivery and commitment to the song's emotive qualities are the things in question. Come showtime, his performance benefited from a guitarist who must've got paid on time it was fabulous. His singing, while distinctive was slightly subdued. Stage presence wise, he was fucking electric. Coach's Corner was all "THAT WAS ASTOUNDING DARLING! #SuperStar!"

Ninth, Kristen Merlin of Team Shakira singing “Let Her Go” by Passenger. Rehearsals indicate that her mic seems to be working. *shaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaade*  Come showtime, her introductory notes seemed a bit shaky. She has lung capacity out the wazoo so this is slightly unacceptable. Good news is that her mic was working. She did perform a radio friendly song so she may have a voting boost. Coach's Corner was all "THAT WAS FLAWLESS DARLING! #SuperStar!"

Finally, HRFH -3.0 of Team Blake singing “Oh Sherrie” by Journey. Rehearsals indicate her vibrato and song selection could screw with her (Let's hope so). Come showtime, she was more over-theatrical than seeing every play on Broadway. Do not pass GO; do NOT collect $200. Coach's Corner was all "THAT WAS PERFECTION DARLING! #SuperStar!"


All in all, this episode was entertaining but had some things to work on; like certain contestants not being able to sing; coaches being way too forgiving and Carson having to do Christina Milian's old job of Twitter reader. (That's what criticism looks like when it's nice and that's coming from me; The World's Sexiest Cynic.)

Up next for scrutiny, the Results of the Top 10.

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