Tuesday, May 21, 2013

The Voice U.S. S4 Recap: Results of The Top 10

The show started with a heartfelt acoustic rendition of "Over You" by Blake and his wife Miranda. Red Cross info was displayed and made my heart grow three sizes. Then, Michelle Rodriguez and Vin Diesel pimped Fast & Furious 6 and Carson's dumb ass used the term "whirlwind" to describe their pimping schedule. "Gurl NO; NO; Gurl NO!"

Now on to who got saved and who should repent for existing...play rough and let's get it on!

The first two saved: Kewpie Doll from Team Blake and Her Royal Fucking Highness from Team Adam. Great...I hate the voting public again -_- Thanks for breathing more life into the "MJ Fan Siphon" conspiracy, Adam.

The next two saved: Michelle "Amazing Human" Chamuel from Team Usher and Sasha Allen from Team Shakira. It's always nice for a breather moment after finding out singers you hate got saved before these singers. Should've been announced first, but hey as long as they're still in this, all is right.

The next person saved: For some odd reason, only one person was announced as safe instead of the usual two. That ended up being Sarah Simmons from Team Adam. Great to know the "fine" taste the voting public has for The Voice -_-.

The next saved: Holly Tucker from Team Blake! She was indeed saved by The Voice Jesus *obligatory "hallelooyer"; "Take it to Churrrch!" moment* and called on alongside Amber, Sasha & Michelle to vanquish the evil known as Judith! > : )

The last two saved: Amber Carrington of Team Adam and The Swon Brothers from Team Blake. As much as I wanted a Team Blake member not named Holly out *shaaaaaaaaaaaaade*, things look like an Adam V.S. Blake showdown. The sexual tension...err "rivalry" [Bitch Please] between Adam and Blake will increase tenfold and I can't wait to see it unfold.

Booted: Sadly, Kris Thomas was no longer able to "Adorn" us ("BOOOOOOOOOO; Get off the stage, bitch!" I know, I know; bad pun is bad) with his presence. On a lighter note, Coldplay fans proved useful as their "Santeria" worked against Josiah Hawley. See you never, "Josy" > : )

All in all, despite the ending shaping to be anticlimactic, The Voice put out good again (Spot the blatant sex joke and you win an RV made of nothing!) Up next for scrutiny, The Top 8 Performances.

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